if i can run in heels then i can drive
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
