I accidentally burped into my bong.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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