he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
