theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
