I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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