If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
