idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
