she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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