you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
