This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
