so explain again why im purple
no
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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