I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize