put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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