I am puke
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
