I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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