it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
