He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
