I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
