this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
