saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
