So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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