I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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