so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Randomize