Don't you send me to vm
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
