At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
