put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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