i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
