He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
