C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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