We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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