when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize