so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
