hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I could have mohawked her pubes.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize