ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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