Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
