There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
