No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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