she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
pop tarts are not kleenex
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
