I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
