she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
