quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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