it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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