so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
