$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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