You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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