Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
