they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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