Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Randomize
