i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Randomize
