Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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