there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
